The Sandwich Theory

It is interesting to understand the logic of the opposite human species at school. Guys try to figure out how the minds of girls operate and vice versa. In a seating with friends (one male amongst several female) I learnt of a very stimulating theory: The Sandwich Theory. It stumbled across as one of my attractive female friends was telling the rest of us that the only male in the crowd called her an old stale sandwich. 

It wasn’t that she was offended by being called a sandwich, seeing that when one is hungry it is something to devour. She was insulted that he put the term “old stale” in front of sandwich.

Before the scorning against men could have begun, he quickly intervened with the breakdown of how his classification came about. He started broad creole:

“We (he and the female friend) gaan da café right, and I gaan inna the line fi order food wen she gone talk to somebody. One ah my bali mi deh fronta me inna the line and he ask me fi hail da li red-skin thing ova deh right. And he d talk up bout dis young gyal like ‘damn she all hot and thing.’ So I da like ‘Who? The one inna the pink shirt?’ He da like ‘no bwai d one inna the white weh you walk in with you!’ So den I da like ‘SHE?! Bwai she da old news, kinda like a old stale sandwich.”

Coincidentally at the same time my female friend over heard what he was saying as she made her way over to the lunch line. She questioned what was the deal with calling her an old stale sandwich? After serious consideration whether he should analyse his theory to a room filled with eight females (all second years) and one male (himself). He began with the scenario:

“You hungry right, and you got two sandwich on the table; wa fresh one just made and a stale one weh mi mek fa two days ago, which one you wa eat?”

Unanimously we agreed the fresh one for health reasons. He then defined his terminology:

“Okay! My point exactly. The young gyal weh you mi d talk to da mi wa first year while you—a second year, deh ya a whole year, you da no fresh meat on campus so you da the old sandwich. I wa tek back the stale part caz unu look like unu wa jump me right now. So yeah this fresh meat—I mean first year new so she da the new sandwich—ripe fi d pickings. No dat I d call unu old in age just dat we done used to see unu, some ah unu got bwaifren, and unu da just fren material now, cya hit pan unu.”

It made me wonder if this was really the mentality of males and even females toward the opposite sex; that because some newer persons comes along we are no longer romantically interested in the existing persons around us. In a sense it is true, for both male and female.

Is the Sandwich Theory plausible? What do you think?